5 Things I Learned From An Unexpected Challenge

On August 21, 2015August 21, 2015 By Robert EvenhouseIn Chasing Life, Uncategorized2 Comments

Ever have an unexpected change that caused you to dig deep and work hard at a moments notice? It happened to me this past week.

This week I was out of the office for a business trip. When I prepared for it a few weeks ago, my coworker and I had a discussion about a presentation one of us had to do while we were there. We decided it would be best for him to do it.

Then, last week, on Friday morning, we discovered another topic would be much more relevant. However, I had more knowledge of the day to day. Thus, it was decided that I would do the presentation. I had two days to prepare.

My first reaction to this change was to ask him to do it because I like to be prepared and I was nervous. But I knew the best way to convey this information was to lean on my knowledge and experience.

Below, I list five things that I learned about this unexpected challenge.

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Low Level Stress Can Be Good.

We’ve all heard stress is terrible and to avoid it. But studies have shown that low level stress releases a chemical called neuotrophins that strengthens connections in our neurons which boosts concentration and productivity. Strange eh? Once I told myself I was going to do it, I was able to focus.

Before Saying No. Prepare As If You Said Yes Then Decide

My first reaction was to say no. But instead of doing so, I gave it some thought. What if I did do it? What information would I need? Once I did this I gained a little confidence and I thought it might not be that bad.

Do You Know It? You Can Do It.

The presentation basically surrounded what I’ve done for their customers and what I do day to day. I realized that no one knew more information about this topic than I did.

Think. What’s The Real Reason The Situation Scares Me?

My main concern revolved around the fact that I thought I’d ruin a highly valuable partnership if I messed up. The pressure mounted. Then a realization hit me, one that deflated my fear. I am being entrusted with this presentation because of my expertise. My company trust me enough to represent it.

Grab The Stage. It’s Time To Grow.

Their are experiences in life that build upon one another. If I am going to speak, I need to practice. If I am going to write novels, I need to write short stories. This was not something to fear. This is what I felt before hockey games in college or grabbing my diploma and heading off into the workforce. This was an opportunity to seize. Not shy away from. And that I did.

What keeps you frozen to the spot?

Can you dissect and tackle it?

What Do Your Kids See When You Write?

On August 19, 2015August 20, 2015 By Robert EvenhouseIn My Life21 Comments

Last week I went down stairs to put a book on my writing desk, when I got there I found something unfortunate, marker dots and streaks on the desk I built not a few months before. It would not come off. Then, I turned to my old desk on the other side of the room and noticed similar marks.

At first I was upset. I’d have to paint my new desk again and figure out how to get the ink out of the wood of my old desk. But first I had to find the culprit.

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It didn’t take long for me to do so. My daughter June, who is five, had the same marker stains on her hands. I asked her about it and she admitted to it reluctantly. I told her she would have to help me paint my desk. Then I saw the papers she held. She asked me to help her staple her book together. The annoyance of having to paint my desk evaporated. Instead, I was thrilled.

While I was at work, she was also working. She was creating a story in the same space that I do. The marker stains were the signature of her effort.

When I realized this I could not have been more joyful to paint my desk again. My beloved daughter was doing her best to follow in the steps of her father. She wanted to write books where her daddy wrote books. She wanted to create too.

I am at awe when I see my kids emulate my wife and I. It simultaneously thrills and terrifies me.

What do your kids or family think of your writing dreams?

Do You Blog For Stats Or Do You Blog With A Message?

On August 18, 2015August 18, 2015 By Robert EvenhouseIn Writing Voice3 Comments

I love stats. At work we use SalesForce.com which has a billion stat tools. It’s a great measurement software, but it can also cause me to move to a place where my day to day does not matter, only getting to the top of the pile does and that’s not how I work best.

This can be true for our blogs too. We have a message, something we know people will benefit from hearing, and we instead get obsessed with the stats page and refresh button. Is this you too?

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When I decided to relaunch my blog again, I had a lot of goals. Big out-there goals. But one drove them all. I wanted to grow my platform.

When I sit back and think about that I feel gross. Don’t you? My desire can shift away from an attempt to change lives, grow my writing career, or to be a part of something bigger than myself to a dirty place where I want a quick hit of traffic.

If you are a blogger my guess is that you’ve been side tracked by this too. You want your platform to grow because that is an important piece of the publication puzzle. No problem, I understand. But what about the content you provide? I wonder what the blogosphere would look like if writers put content out there that matter to them or served others rather than themselves?

I apologize if that’s been me. I don’t want to be the quick hit guy who lives on some strange dimly lit corner of the web looking for that bag of 100 followers. I want it to be more valuable to you. I came here to share the joy of words, the thrill of writing a new piece of fiction, and to encourage you to move forward in that direction.

From here on out you get this promise from me, in blood if I could do that on this post. Er, maybe too creepy? But here we go.

I pledge to provide helpful and encouraging content. Not be yet another inauthentic traffic grabbing blogger. I’ll do my best to share what I know for your benefit, not my own.

So here’s to great content that challenges ideas and changes small things, like the world.

Do you find yourself writing for traffic? Or do you provide content that helps?

Its Time To Tell Your Self Critique Voice To Shut It

On August 17, 2015August 17, 2015 By Robert EvenhouseIn Blogging1 Comment

I can be crazy. In fact, I’ll prove it.

On a trip to Florida a few years back, my wife and I stayed in a condo with my parents, grandmothers, and brother. We were surprising my other brother for his birthday and had flown down from Michigan.

When I sleep there cannot be any rhythmic noises or my mind will catch the beat and I’ll subsequently stay awake.

Thus when some crazy animal started mewing or barking (it sounded like both) at three in the morning it was annoying. By three fifteen I was growing angry and by three thirty I was marching across the parking lot, rock in hand to put an end to the creature. I tossed rocks into a forest until the bird/animal/little devil flew off to annoy someone else.

Yeah, that crazy. But I slept like a babe from four until seven.

As in the example above, we also carry these bird squawks or something similar in our minds. They are deadly to our creativity, living in the vary place our art comes from. And they offer a constant nagging of how unrealistic our dreams are.

Ever try to write or start to write a business plan and begin to get defeated right away? How many times even before we begin we start to think of why we shouldn’t attempt to try ___ in the first place – money, time, family obligations, work, and anything else march across our mind like a mariachi band.

There is something to learn from my manic story above. The next time your inner voice starts to sound the alarm, grab some rocks, snip the chord, pull out the batteries, and stuff proverbial cotton balls in your ears. Tell your inner critique to shut their mouth.

It might be impossible right now to be a New York Times Bestseller. But if we stop ourselves before we begin we may never know where the journey may take us.

Don’t Be A Cover Band

On August 11, 2015August 10, 2015 By Robert EvenhouseIn Writing Tips3 Comments

I listen to music while I work and enjoyed Grooveshark.com before the site went dark. Now, I’ve settled on Pandora. Many of the artists blend together with my suggested band and often there is little distinction.

Have you ever had that experience?

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This can be true for novels as well. You see people following someone else’s formula or ground breaking achievements and instead of producing a work that only they can produce, they write recycled stories.

The book might sell, but it’s a fad and not something that will be remembered in fifteen years.

Then there is that magical time, when I am in the middle of filling out an Excel spreadsheet and I freeze. The music and lyrics are fresh and new. A chill runs down my spine and I forget to click the thumbs up button because I am enraptured.

Have you ever had that experience? Where you are pulled out of the monotony and surprised by a book or a song that instills wonder and captivates you? I hope we all strive for that kind of uniqueness in our work.

One of my favorite podcasts is by Todd Henry founder of Accidental Creative. His closing quote is always the same “Cover bands don’t change the world, don’t be a cover band. You need to find your unique voice if you want to thrive.”

Create your art. Don’t get distracted by other people. Write what matters to you. Write the sort of book you’d like to read, the type that sets trends and stands alone.

How To Always Have Something To Write About

On August 10, 2015August 9, 2015 By Robert EvenhouseIn The Writing Process6 Comments

Do you have that writer friend that is an amazing blogger, short story writer, or novelist? Yeah, I’ve disowned that person too.

I am in awe of the constant do-er, the everdayer, the consummate professional who always seems to have something to write about.

I struggled with this for a while as I reviewed my plan for my blog re-launch. How will I be able to sustain a pace and not give up like the pros?

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A few months ago, I started seeking out the top echelon of successful bloggers and platform builders. I found a lot of people I admire. You know what else I found out? They all knew each other.

Part of this should not have been a surprise. Once you reach a certain level of anything you want to be with people who have done the same thing. If you play a sport for two decades and want to grow, you can’t do so playing with a first timer. You have to compete with those at your level.

But this was not the main take away from this search. The real point was that they were all conversing about similar topics. And they talked amongst each other on one another’s blog or podcast or Vlog. They endorse each other’s books and attend each other’s book launch.

This gave me a huge nugget of insight. Conversation. This is what blogging, or any art, is about. Interaction, digging deeper into subjects, and then coming away with a response is all part of being an artist. Suddenly I found myself furiously writing down responses or ideas that sprung to mind when I interacted with them.

This is the key to blogging. You want to be a novelist? Read books about authors, by your favorite authors, and write about them. Your answer could be what you’ve learned, things you’d do differently, or ideas for books you may have. Stuff your head full of this material.

Art is not expression in a vacuum. It’s reciprocal.

So get in the conversation. Part of it is listening well. The other part is responding. If you do this, you’ll never run out of things to say.

Turn Your Day Dreams Into Action

On August 7, 2015August 5, 2015 By Robert EvenhouseIn Chasing Life4 Comments

If you’ve ever seen the movie The Secret Life of Walter Mitty you’ve been inside the mind of a dreamer. Someone who desires to say hello to the girl, stand up to a bully, and speak their mind. The film grows from the absurd internal thoughts of a shell of a man to an individual who goes after the life he wants.

This is fiction of course. Or is it?

Have you had thoughts like that before? Where you had a glimpse the life you wanted, the job you crave, or the hobby you just didn’t have time to invest in? Then you let it sink into the chaos of a life filled with the churning waters of busy. Good. I’m not the only one.

The problem here is not the dream. The issue is action. We are dreamers. Ideas come and go all day. But then we go to bed, to a meeting, back to the grind.

Have you ever stopped and asked yourself what your life would look like if you started to move toward your dream, even just one inch in that direction?

What if you began to write every day no matter what? Or took one night and did a pottery class? What if you volunteered for a campaign? Maybe asked someone to lunch who is closer to where you want to be and picked their brain?

Life is not easy, and we aren’t promised one more day. But is not a life lived with the desires of our hearts far better than one lived only in our mind?

There is, of course, no guarantee that we’ll get to the place we want to be. But I assure you of one thing. You’ll be closer to realizing it than you were yesterday. And if you stick with it, you’ll have the best chance of reaching it some day.

Writer, Why Do You Keep Writing? Find Your Why.

On August 6, 2015August 5, 2015 By Robert EvenhouseIn The Writing Life5 Comments

In yesterdays post was about treating your writing like a job. This I said will help you get out of bed, stay up late, and place it on a higher level of importance. But one commenter brought up a great point that I failed to mention. Getting out of bed and getting to work is much more compelling when we know the reason we are doing it.

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Discovering Your Why

Do you have a dream or project that you enjoy and want to work harder at but just cannot bring yourself to do it consistently? I totally get that. Many writers bail after the first year or so. I once read that the average blog lasts eight months.

Writing day after day without recognition or any growth that we can see is tough. Part of the reason is the “I want success now” mentality of our western culture. The other part? Maybe we don’t have a ‘Why’, a reason we are doing it.

Have you ever sat down and thought of your Why? The reason you are writing or chasing your dream in the first place? If it is money you have most likely figured out you may have a better chance of making more money doing part time shifts at Starbucks for years than making millions on your creative endeavor.

Okay money may become part of the equation, but I firmly believe your Why must mean more than this. It must give you a thrill or a tickle or a vision of a life worth living when you think of it.

Give Your Why Some Space

Don’t know what your Why is? It can be tricky if you haven’t given it any thought. I encourage you to take a chunk of time and go somewhere you get clarity. Go visit a park, a coffee shop, or a dark closet where no one can find you.

Then think for however long it takes you to give you clarity. You’ll most likely have to revisit this time and time again and it may change as you grow. But the overall purpose of discovering your Why will go a long way toward motivating you to work harder and invest more in the life you want.

My Why

My Why is twofold. One, I love encouraging people. I love to bring energy to projects and help people realize their potential. Second, I’d love to write and speak for a living and hopefully elbow out more time with my family.

These are the reasons I write.

What is/are your Why(s)?

Why You Should Treat Your Book Like A Part-Time Job

On August 5, 2015August 4, 2015 By Robert EvenhouseIn The Writing Process4 Comments

Have you ever woke up and thought, I’ll just go into work late today? We all have. But we get up anyway. Its work and we need to go. Our family and our mortgage depend on us.

A few weeks ago I got up at 5am to work on my book. I did this for a week. My life, much like yours is stuffed full and this was quite a feat. Then a vacation came and I stopped. It’s been a few weeks since and I’ve yet to get up early again.

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There is a huge problem with this lack of consistent effort. This is my dream, and that’s not reason enough to wake early? I decided to sit myself down, much like any manager would, and have talk about the importance of punctuality. Do I care enough about writing to do it full time? The answer was a quick yes. It is my dream. I knew I needed to challenge myself in the way I thought about my work and maybe you do too.

If we wrote like we were punching a clock, we might be more successful at putting our time in. After all, could you imagine telling your boss, ‘I was just a bit too tired from doing yard work yesterday, so I thought I’d just come in later’? If that doesn’t work for you, maybe you volunteer at your church, or a charity or museum. Can you imagine telling the people who count on you that you didn’t show up because you wanted a few extra hours of sleep? Or that your got carried away in your Netflix queue again?

Don’t misunderstand me. I’m not saying sleep or recreation is unimportant. We all need more sleep than we get on an average night and it’s okay to stop and recharge. My point is to ask the serious question about your craft. Is this worth it? Is it my dream? If so, why don’t we pick it up, dust it off, and place it on a higher shelf of importance?

I finished this blog at 5:37am. It matters to me.

Does it matter to you?

How To Not Be Intimidated By The First (or Blank) Page Ever Again

On August 4, 2015August 4, 2015 By Robert EvenhouseIn The Writing ProcessLeave a comment

Have you ever perused a gallery of half finished art? How about watched an unedited movie? Bought a book that has no ending?

Of course not. All of those things would be a waste of time. But this is what we do with our books. When we start, we think they are already on display and worry over every word.

We fret over the first line as if once it’s typed it’ll cure and we can never change it again. And then our book dies because of unfair expectation. But does it have to be like this?

Perfection on the first try is a myth. Or if it is perfect the first time it’s because the individual put in constant hours of play and practice out of the public eye. They tested new methods or perfected one and seemingly burst onto the scene.

But our pages, as well as a lump of clay or canvas, are places to grow and learn. They are what software developers call a sandbox. A place to test. A place to see what happens.

While it’s easier said than done to separate ourselves from our work like a software developer does, we’re doing the same thing and just need to change our mindset.

When you say to yourself that you’re creating a piece of art the pressure to be prefect shoots through the roof. What if you just call it a project or a product? Will this make your work cliché or a business rather than an expression of who you are?

I say do whatever you have to do to keep going. I trick myself all of the time to see where my latest project will go.

Put it this way, if you are backpacking across the Appalachian Trail mile marker one is not the place to gauge whether or not you are a professional hiker. If you stop there, you’d miss the bad weather and a possible bear encounter, sure, but also the views, other people who can share in your journey, and the joy of the distant finish.

So writer, don’t put too much pressure on yourself at the beginning. Writing is hard work as it is. Before you struggle to perfect the backstroke, there came the thrill and joy of just swimming. So just jump in and enjoy it.

PART-TIME NOVEL

Tag: Writing